Please help welcome author Teresa Carpenter, she is sharing with us how she paces her scene and sequels.
STOLEN KISS FROM A PRINCE
The door opened and
Katrina walked barefoot into the lounge. She wore a lush white bathrobe that
brushed her bare pink-tipped toes. Under it was a white garment trimmed in lace
cut nearly as low as the V of the robe.
His gaze jerked to
hers from the soft swell of her breasts visible in that V. She was so pale
there was very little difference between her skin and the white of her
nightclothes. Except for the shadows he’d noted earlier.
“Is Sammy okay?”
she asked in a voice husky from sleep, her brow furrowed in concern. “Have you
called the doctor?”
“His injury is not
the problem,” he assured her, his brusqueness more for his benefit than hers.
“Tessa woke him as instructed, but he will not go back to sleep.”
She gave a resigned
nod, the action making her head appear too heavy for her slender neck. There’d
been no sign of softness or frailness when she attacked him in the nursery.
Just fierce protection of Samson.
Now he saw how tiny
she was, clearly no more than five-four at the most. At six-two he towered over
her. The oversize robe didn’t help. Nor did her fiery mane of hair, which she’d
tamed into a braid that hung halfway down her back. But without makeup, her
skin appeared starkly white against the vibrant color of her hair.
“Shall we go?” She
moved forward, swaying slightly.
He ground his
teeth, half tempted to send her back to bed. More than tempted to join her
there. He dismissed the inappropriate thought, disgusted with his libido for
rising up when his full attention should be on his brother’s family.
Samson’s needs came
first.
“Where are your
shoes?” he demanded, focusing on the practical.
She stopped and
frowned, as if it took an effort to think. He was reminded she, too, had taken
a knock to the head.
“I’ll fetch them.”
The maid disappeared into the bedroom and returned a moment later with a pair
of fuzzy slippers. Katrina slipped them on; her pink-tipped toes peeked through
the end.
She rubbed her
forehead. “Would you prefer I take the time to dress?”
Yes. There was
something entirely too intimate about her in nightgown and robe.
“No.” Again he
thought of Samson, saw tear trails on pale cheeks. “Let’s go.”
He followed her
from the room and was surprised when the maid also stepped into the hall.
“It is all right,
Anna.” Katrina bid the maid. “Thanks for watching over me. You can go now.”
“Oh, but I have
doctor’s orders,” the young woman protested.
Annoyed by the
delay, Julian bit back his impatience to address the woman. “What are your
instructions? I’ll see she’s cared for the rest of the night.”
Clearly upset with
the change in circumstances but unable to countermand his authority, Anna
outlined the doctor’s instructions. “You must wake her every few hours and ask
her questions to make sure she is coherent. If she’s not, or you notice
anything strange about her pupils, or she gets sick, you need to call the
doctor immediately.”
As she spoke, he
automatically looked into Katrina’s eyes to check her pupils and found himself
lost in the solemn depths. Blinking, he turned to the maid, acknowledged her
instructions and sent her on her way. While he took care of that, Katrina
started ahead of him.
Her actions caused
him to scowl. Protocol demanded she follow him. Sighing, he decided to cut her
some slack; she had a concussion after all. However, it didn’t escape his
notice she appeared to know the way.
Though it may only
mean she’d asked after where Samson would be, Julian believed it was more than
that. She’d probably been the one to put him to bed. He wasn’t okay with that.
He’d charged Tessa with taking the boy to his rooms, made it clear he’d wanted
her to resume care of the boy.
Already his
authority was being undermined.
Something he would
not tolerate.
“Mademoiselle—”
Damn. What was her name? He quickly closed the distance between them. “I wish
to make myself clear. Your assistance with Samson is appreciated. That does not
mean I will abide interference with my decisions regarding his care.”
“Of course,” she
responded as she pressed the button to call the elevator.
“Are you mocking
me?” he challenged, crowding her.
She blinked those
big violet eyes at him as she shrank back, making him feel as if he’d chastised
an innocent.
“No,” she said, and
entered the elevator. She moved into the corner, her toes curling into her slippers.
She pulled the edges of her robe together and tightened the sash. “I know you
want what is best for him.” A wan smile lifted the corner of her mouth.
“Otherwise I would not be here right now.”
He searched her
features for any hint of guile but saw only the ashen evidence of her
exhaustion. She looked so fragile he thought of sending her back to her bed.
Only the thought of Samson’s suffering kept him resolute.
“Excellent.” The
elevator doors opened and he waved her forward. “As long as you understand.”
They traveled the
remainder of the distance in silence. Which made the sound of Samson’s cries
all the more grating as they approached the door to Julian’s rooms.
Inside the suite,
tears stained the cheeks of both Tessa and Samson. The nanny had been walking
the boy, trying to soothe him, but upon his and Katrina’s arrival, she began
sobbing.
“I can’t take
anymore.” She thrust Samson into Katrina’s arms and fled.
Katrina didn’t
hesitate. She wrapped Samson close and started talking to him. “Hey, baby, it
is fine. I am here. Does your head hurt?” She kissed his light curls. “Mine,
too.”
Though he continued
to cry, there was no denying Samson preferred the redhead to the blonde.
Instead of fighting the embrace by curling up and putting his arms and legs between
his body and Tessa’s, he clung to Katrina’s lusher figure.
Finding the scene
painful to watch, knowing this might just be the beginning of Samson’s trials,
Julian moved to the fireplace to start a fire. This was going to be a long
night.
Pacing is an
important element in a story. It helps to keep the reader engaged. I like to
use scene and sequel to help keep the pacing fluid and relevant. Let me
demonstrate how the same elements support the setup of the story of STOLEN KISS
FROM A PRINCE. In the setup Prince Julian’s GOAL is to protect his young
nephew, Sammy, who has been traumatized by the news his parents are lost (and
presumed dead). The CONFLICT comes from the fact he believes Katrina, the nanny
at the palace his brother was visiting and where Sammy has been staying, told
his nephew of the plane crash when there was no need, causing unnecessary
trauma. As a result Julian doesn’t want Sammy anywhere near Katrina.
Unfortunately, DISASTER, Sammy has bonded with Katrina and the three year old
won’t respond to anyone else, including his own nanny.
The excerpt
of STOLEN KISS FROM A PRINCE reflects the elements of GOAL, CONFLICT, and
DISASTER. Julian returns to his rooms to find Sammy in tears and his nanny
unable to soothe the child. Against his better judgment, Julian seeks out
Katrina to assist with Sammy (GOAL). When he arrives at her rooms, he’s finds
her looking vulnerable and desirable and he questions his right/decision to ask
her to help Sammy (CONFLICT). Katrina doesn’t hesitate to offer her assistance.
Though she’s injured she accompanies Julian to his suite, and when she sees
Sammy’s distress she wraps him in her arms. Watching them, Julian realizes his
control of the situation is in jeopardy (Disaster).
Below I
outline the stages of scene and sequel.
SCENE AND SEQUEL / PACING
SCENE:
Ø
Goal:
Sets up read expectations, gives the reader something to root for on behalf of
the characters.
Ø
Conflict:
Road blocks, complications, and emotional hurdles. Oh my.
Ø
Disaster:
Establishes the importance of the goal. How badly does the character want their
goal? Are they willing to fight for it?
SEQUEL:
Ø
Dilemma:
Reveals character motivation, growth or lack of growth.
Ø
Decision:
Redefines reader expectations and heightens the tension.
Ø
Hook/resolution:
Draws the reader into the next scene/chapter or resolves the story.
To keep the
reader engaged and the pacing interesting you’ll want to vary the flow and
frequency of scene and sequel. For example you may want to run a couple of
scenes together followed by a sequel especially in high action sequences. This
escalates the pace and energy. Sequels slow the action but reveal emotion.
Another way
to use scene and sequel to impact the pacing is to show the scene/action from
one point of view and the sequel/reaction from the opposing point of view. It
can also be a powerful juxtaposition to write back to back sequels from
opposing points of view, showing the characters at emotional odds.
TIP: If scene
is focused on one element of story, weave another element into the sequel. For
example, in a suspense if the scene is focused on the romance, in the sequel
bring the mystery back into play.
Buy Links:
Teresa Carpenter on the Web:
Sounds cute.
ReplyDeleteLoved the excerpt. Thanks for sharing Teresa add well as the insight into scene and sequel placing :)
ReplyDeleteI attended a workshop on this back when I was an aspiring romance author. Romance novelists have the best story building tools, I swear!
ReplyDeleteKelly, thanks for hosting me. My example reflected goal, conflict, and disaster, the elements of a scene, but if I had to pick the most under used element of scene and sequel, it would be in the sequel part @ dilemma, decision, and hook specifically decision. If a book seems a little flat, it may be because the author got caught up in the angst of the dilemma and forget to reveal the characters decision of what comes next.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the support ladies. Creating my own fairy tale was fun. Who is you fave prince/king hero? I go right to the movies and Clive Owen in King Arthur.
ReplyDeleteDisaster is a great word - it really puts the conflict and the characters' needs into jeopardy. I've got to remember it when I'm trying to raise the stakes on my characters!
ReplyDeleteDeniz, my example reflected goal, conflict, and disaster, the elements of a scene, but if I had to pick the most under used element of scene and sequel, it would be in the sequel part @ dilemma, decision, and hook specifically decision. If a book seems a little flat, it may be because the author got caught up in the angst of the dilemma and forget to reveal the characters decision of what comes next.
ReplyDelete