Amy Ruttan on the Web:
Over to Amy now...
Deep
Point of View and Showing vs. Telling are very similar tools a writer can use
to engage a reader further into the story.
One
easy way to sometimes punch up some drab tags is to add a little bit more kick to them.
For
example:
“Let’s go this
way,” she said.
“No, I want to
go this way,” he said.
“Why?” She
asked.
“Because I said
so.”
It’s
kind of a bland bit of dialogue. So let’s snap it up with some Deep POV.
“Let’s go this
way.” The words came out in a pant as she tried to catch her breath.
“No, I want to
go this way.”
“Why?” She
asked, finally regaining her composure. She didn’t understand his need to go
left instead of right and couldn’t understand why they were arguing about it at
this moment. The longer they lingered, the more danger they were in.
“Because I said
so.” There was finality to his tone, one which brooked no argument.
Deep
POV doesn’t always work this way. We sometimes need the he said, she said and
dialogue tags aren’t needed after every piece of dialogue. It’s a bit of a balancing
act.
You
want the reader to be able to follow along, but readers can get annoyed when
you over do it.
“I like ice
cream,” Jane said.
“Do you?” Adam
asked.
“Of course,”
Jane said.
“I do to,” Adam
said.
“Really?” Jane
asked.
It’s
knowing when to add and when to subtract.
I
know that’s not very helpful, but that’s why the fresh eyes of a critique
partner or a good Beta reader come in handy. They can help cull things for you.
I have a habit of repeating words or choosing similar names.
There
are no hard and fast rules to writing. As I said before and will say again,
always keep learning your craft. Your readers will thank you for it.
While celebrating her promotion, the last thing strait-laced orthopedic surgeon Ingrid Walton expects is to be seduced by mysterious dashing soldier and army medic Clint Allen. Especially when there are consequences to their passionate night!
…becomes "living for two"!
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There is a print signed copy of PREGNANT WITH THE SOLDIER'S SON for one commenter. Open International.
Thanks to Amy for her tips on craft. I wish her much success with her new book. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Lexa!
DeleteGood luck Amy... Nice points for a writer too.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Farzana! :)
DeleteIt definitely is a balancing act, and CPs are great for helping with that.
ReplyDeleteIt is, Kelly. It's hard to figure out, but if you keep working hard it will come to you and I would be lost without my awesome CP. She knocks sense into me.
DeleteHello to Amy and best of luck on your new book!
ReplyDeleteThank you! :)
DeleteMy CPs helped me slash millions of dialogue tags when I first started writing! Hadn't thought of it before then - great advice! The book sounds great too!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jemi. Yes, when I was first starting out I did a lot of things I shouldn't and my grammar was atrocious. As long as you're willing to learn and grow you'll find success.
DeleteYet more great tips, I'm sure my problem would not be embellishing the text but knowing how much was too much.
ReplyDeleteThanks Amy and good luck with the book.
And that is a problem in itself too, Tracy. Knowing when enough is enough and where not to embellish.
DeleteThank you for the best wishes.
Great examples! I worry about overdoing it, but there's nothing worse than totally bland dialogue.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Meradeth. Yes, bland dialogue can totally pull a reader out of a story just as much as overdoing it.
DeleteThese are good examples. It's always a matter of knowing when to embellish the text with thoughts and action, and when to keep it simple.
ReplyDeleteExactly, Sherry! Having fresh eyes definitely help.
DeleteGreat advice! And critique partners are so helpful in pointing out repetition. Congrats, Amy!
ReplyDeleteYes a good CP is worth their price in gold, Cherie! I really pick a pet word every first draft and repeat it over and over. I'm getting better, but it's a quirk to my writing.
DeleteIt's all about getting into the character's heads, eh? I love it when we get so deep into a character we can't bear to be parted with them and have to read the story again or latch onto anything else the author has penned.
ReplyDeleteYes, it certainly is, Crystal. Though when I'm on tight deadlines I have to shake my characters faster than I would like. As for characters I read, I don't mind them sticking around. :)
DeleteGreat examples of deep POV. Pushing deeper into the characters really does bring the story alive.
ReplyDeleteIt does, Lynda! :) Thank you for visiting.
DeleteNo wonder writing is called an art! I have no idea how anyone even begins to write a book – but I’m glad they do because I really enjoy reading them.
ReplyDeleteAww thank you, Barbara. It's all about learning. Constantly. Though when I told that to my daughter's class the kids weren't impressed, but the teacher certainly was. LOL
DeleteSometimes I struggle with telling during deep pov instead of showing...
ReplyDelete...Soldier's Son sounds like a great book!
I love the example...it illustrates it perfectly. Good writing is finding that perfect mix of dialogue and action/narrative.
ReplyDeleteHello Kelly Steel!! Thank you for the sample of using deep POV to spice up bland dialogue! Using this technique really elevated the conversation to something else amazing! Yay!
ReplyDeleteAwww hope Ingrid and Clint heal their wounds and traumas to face a beautiful future together! Take care
x
Great examples. It's not easy to explain. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI thought this was very helpful advice. Great example of deep POV. I agree that having a critique partner or someone else to give you feedback on your writing is so important. Dialogue tags are one place they can tell you if the tags aren't needed or if it is too confusing without them. :) Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDelete